4-23-16 thoughts

An Actual Log

Today was Passover in 2016, and we enjoyed church service last night as the beginning of our yearly special services that coincide the Lord's Feasts.

Many things have been on my mind and heart lately. There's been much battle and spiritual warfare the past few weeks...or maybe I should say months...okay it would more properly be said the last year has been warfare. Yet I'm not the type to consider warfare to mean some sort of depressing state or down in the dumps style of valleys. Some do that. Me? I prefer to see the truth that warfare is action, warfare requires spiritual fighting, both defense and offense. It does not mean sitting down in the battlefield letting the enemy punch and kick and hit and attack and lay into you while you complain or cry about what's going on, with your Sword still sheathed and your shield on the ground and your armor scattered about.

No, warfare requires you to praise the Lord ferociously, learn to use the Word of God and speak the truth to the lies of the enemy and rebuke the enemy and glorify the Lord as you plant your feet deep and press on, with peace and joy. There is no "letting the enemy depress/discourage/plant thoughts/whatever" in warfare. When you notice the enemy is getting after you, if you let him continue instead of rebuke him and bind him up and lay into him like you'd lay into some weaker thief that intrudes into your home (the devil IS weaker than you if you are in Christ Jesus; He is a fallen angel, whereas you have the Almighty God dwelling in you)...if you let him rob you and just sit by as he does so, complaining or listening to him then you are indeed that person I described who is sitting on the battlefield above.

But this isn't all that has been on my mind lately. What has been on my mind, and more properly in my heart, is a bit upsetting. I'm not sure I could even properly describe it here, or perhaps even if I should attempt it. But to put it very loosely, I grow weary in seeing far too many say "yea and amen" in churches and elsewhere and yet never walk in their call. Time is growing short. We cannot waste time any longer. And I know I am above all, talking to myself. I've mentioned elsewhere and have admitted so many times that for a period of perhaps 6-7 years I allowed myself to get distracted and off track from what God had called me to do, due to listening to others and not God. And to this day I feel I am the one at fault for certain things not yet being present in my life in regard to what God has called me to do. What is worse, is that I am unsure how many more days I have left to do what God has told me to do. Two years perhaps? Less time than that? Would I be blessed with more time than that? I used to not want more time but would rather be in heaven at this very moment. Yet the thought that the Lord would give me more than two years longer to work for Him in this world, is almost like a sigh of relief because of all those years I wasted. But...God's will be done, not mine. I will go home when the Lord knows it's time, not a second before, and not a second after.

Yet, there are things bothering me lately, that I see far too much. . . .selfishness in the church (by church, you should know I speak of the true church, the Body of Christ, not some building). There are far too many who, because the world is getting more wicked and anti-Christ, are turning their eyes and hearts inward and toward themselves and only themselves...or toward other believers and not a world that is dying and in need of the Life of Christ. Far too often, I see the harvest fields white and ready, and yet too many labourers sitting at a table just chatting it up about how good supper was yesterday. All the while, false labourers are out there reaping these souls, and leading them to their spiritual death with doctrines of devils...while the labourers sit, and complain, and criticize at what's happening...

It makes me want to yell, to slap, to grab people by the collar, shake them, and say "SHUT UP and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!"

I brought a similar topic before the Lord recently. I asked Him, "What am I supposed to do? What can be done? I've tried for years, and I've taught and preached and spoken and counseled and tried for years, and it's to no avail it seems. I know YOU are the One who gives the increase and it's all out of my hands, my job is simply to obey you. But what am I going to do? How are these people going to wake up?! Do I have to just get others from the outside and focus on THEM and stir THEM up to walk in what You've called them to do, and ignore the sleepers? Maybe the new ones will stir up the proper zeal?" and the Lord's reply was along the lines of "You know it."

Over the decades that the Lord has blessed me to use me to minister and counsel to various people, I've learned many things, and one of the things is of course, you can't force someone to obey God and walk with the Lord. I'm reminded simply of what Jesus told His disciples about any cities that didn't want them when they went to preach the Gospel. He told them to shake their dust off their feet, and MOVE ON to another place that WOULD accept the Lord. We don't read that the Lord told them to keep trying to force the Lord on them. He doesn't say to complain about being rejected. He doesn't say to be frustrated by them, or to talk about them, or to get upset about them, or whatever. He pretty much says, move on. In our limited time here on earth, we would be wise to spend it doing what God would have us do, instead of trying to do what we THINK we ought to do or what we WANT to do. Not everyone will be saved. Not everyone wants to be saved. Not everyone is simply blind (remember the pharisees who heard the Truth and still refused, and Jesus told them they were no longer blind...John 9:41). So, instead of trying to convince a city to accept the Lord and insist on revival to a people who don't want to be awakened...we ought better to simply move to another soul upon which the Father has been preparing their hearts and drawing them to the Lord Jesus and they're just waiting for you, the seed-planter/the waterer/the laborer, to come along.

And I know, I speak this to myself more than anything. And I need to be reminded and I need to LISTEN. As the Lord said...I already have been told by Him what to do, and already know. Though I sure do long for the day for fellow labourers whose heart is not on themselves, but who have the same heart as the Lord, who care about ministering to people who need the Lord.

All these things and more run through my mind and heart the past few weeks. And as the feast of Unleavened Bread begins, I await to see what the Lord has in store, according to the Word He gave me "When? Now." and "Deliverance."

"Father, thank You for loving me, for loving us! Please, help me to see me as YOU see me. All I see in the mirror is nothing, no one important, and of no consequence, and therefore the temptation to fade into silence is great. But Lord, You know all things, and I ask, Father, please help me to walk in what You would have me walk in. No more wasting time, no more feeling stuck, no more excuses or distractions. Let me see only You, hear only what You would have me hear, and let only Your Words come from my mouth. And please, teach me to love You the way You love me. I love You, Lord, and thank You so much, for everything...for YOU."